Thanks Germany for visiting!!

It's so interesting to say the least.. I've put this Neo Counter yesterday. I do not have many visitors as you can see (not just yet!:), but I want to thank Germany for visiting my blog. Thanks so much - I hope you'll keep coming back...

Of course, I am looking forward to my Neo Counter to show me all the other visitors from around the world! This is soooooo exciting - Yay!!!

Afternoon coffee..well, actually it was an afternonn beer.

When love life doesn't fly like a butterfly, I turn to my girlfriends. They are always there for me without judgement. This is my best friend Miss J - We're supposed to have a cup of coffee, but we ended up having beers instead, from 2pm in the afternoon!!! Actually, we both needed it so bad!!!! I think we needed alcohol to calm our nerves...

I'm fotunate to have my friends who just willingly sit in front of me and listen to my bs, sometimes depressing stories. They always say "Honey, we're here for you, that's what friends are for.." I'm truly graterful for the friendships I have with them...

Love in Mute....

I've been talking about my relationship with my husband for the past few days. Well, we have not been getting along and every time we talk, ends up in disagreement or argument. Therefore, him and I are not talking to each other, especially today. We're totally in mute. He's watching TV and I'm typin this blog. Why???? Yes, yes, we fail to communicate each other, that's why. He often times blames my ability to understand what he says/asks just because I'm Japanese (I'm originally from Japan.) Is that fair? I mean can he speak Japanese? No. So, I want him to be more understanding of my shortcomings when it comes to English. I did pass my proficiency test before graduating high school though.

This is so frustrating and depressing. Good lord, I have my two daughters, they save my sanity...

Text or Not Text?

I'm a big fan of text messaging. I think it's so convenient especially when I don't want to bother my friends who are busy at work by calling them asking stupid questions. You can just text and get message across in a sec, if they don't like my question, then they can igonore it or they reply with smiles.

But one of my best friends Miss K asked me the other day, "why do I always send him a text and get upset??" She is talking about this guy she is dating for a while and she somehow measures his feelings for her by his reply; how fast he responds or the tone of his message. If he doesn't reply within 5 minutes, she starts to freak out and convince that he must be cheating or he must not like her anymore. The relationship is over!!!! See... I think that's the problem for many women (and maybe some men) who love to text, but hate it at the same time. Because text messaging doesn't require a lot of courage (making a phone call does so depends on the situation) , it's an instant communication between two people who are far away from each other. They want the instant reply because really, that's the point of text messaging. If they don't have to hear the answer right away, they would probably call and leave a message.

So, I told her if she doesn't like to wait for his reply, then she should go back to the old way of making phone calls instead. Maybe that would make much more sense because then, she doesn't have to worry about him replying right away. And it would always be nice to hear his voice I assume... What do you think? Do you like to text or hate it?

Going to bed mad

So, I wasn't sure what to do before going to bed last night; should I sleep with him in the same bed or should I sleep in a separate bed? Well, I chose to sleep in the same bed although I was still really upset about what happened last night, but I thought I would just feed the fire if I didn't sleep in the bed with him. So I did, puffing and huffing, crawling into the bed. Funny thing is I fell asleep really fast! I thought I would toss and turn forever, but it didn't take long for me to the ZZZ time.

When I woke up, I could still see that my husband was upset from last night. Knowing that he's still upset, of course I didn't talk to him. I told him good morning, but that was it and he left for work.... It sucks. It wasn't my fault that we fought. It just that we are going through the phase of whatever we say it rubs each other in the wrong way. Don't you go through the same thing sometimes????? Then after awhile of non-stop bickering, the wall between us would shift and we are fine again. I don't get it. But right now, our relationship sucks and I don't like it...

I'm soooooo over it!!!!

I'm so tired of fighting with my husband. I've had it. I'm fed up!!! I've always believed and thought that we can work our differences and make it through because we love each other. But now, after all these years, I start to suspect that maybe "love" is not enough to keep us together. I don't even know if I should talk about my personal matter here, but what a hey, no one is reading this anyway, so I will just let it all out!

My husband and I have been married for six years. Thank God, we have two most beautiful daughters - I mean I don't even know how we got so lucky to be blessed with them. I'm so graterful...and yet, we can't seem to get it together even for our girls. We pretty much bickering at each other everyday (well, we go through these cycles of getting along and not getting along), God only knows for what or even why. What I know is though that we both want to be right and choose to fight and argue instead of work things out, compromise and make peach. It takes two to start an argument, but I always feel that it only takes one to start a fight. I get defensive, he gets defensive; when have we become this couple who can't even talk to each other????

There are so many reasons why I feel this way about my husband; all the resentmen towards him. I will talk about him more later when I am calm.. People often say "Don't go to bed angry!!!" Well, he went to bed angry and I'm angry still. The question is should I sleep next to him? The answer will be in tomorrow's blog. Good night.

Heroes....

I realized that I really haven't come here to let out all my thoughts... So many things have happened; good and bad, but I'm always busy running around the house, chasing my two little girls. I also have been trying to set up my own website --- that has consumed all my time at this moment.

The reason I'm writing this blog today is because I have had the chance to see the most incredible and courageous people on TV last week... My husband and I were watching Dateline on NBC ; the topic was human trafficking in Cambodia. Hidden camera was showing all these little girls sold to breothels as sex slaves. 5, 9 or 11 year old girls who are subjected to have sex with men, mostly coming from Western countries as tourists. It was plain disgusting and shocking. I felt this anger that filled my whole body.

I have two little daughters, 2 and 4 year old. All I saw was my daughters' face on TV, those poor little girls'... their innocence were lost long gone... How could this awful thing happen??? Adults are supposed to protect the little souls, not to harm them.

When the program finally introduced those incredible people who have been trying to help the girls in Cambodia, rescuing them from the brothels, I could not help, but cry. Mr. James Pond and his family left sunny California to Cambodia, so they could at least do something, something to help the girls. Not many people are as courageous, selfless and heroic as Pond family. But Pond family also made me realize that maybe, I, too, can change the world, little by litte, one step at a time.

I want to give a standing ovation to Mr. James Pond and his family, and all the people who are doing everything they can to stop the child sex slavery... Thank you so much!!!! You are true heroes!!!!